First Time

Everyone has a first for everything. I too had my first in something. First time to feel how my heart actually felt hurt from losing someone. It was not a pleasant feeling. It is horrible, I act like I was fine in front of that person, but actually I am deeply wounded. You basically just feel empty, it's like the whole world is pointless. You just go and sit alone in the class, twirling your hair. Yes, I did. Lecturers were teaching and you were like, "Hey, what's going on, what did she asked to do?". I ended up not focusing in class which I thought I was doing but I didn't. I ended up studying, I guessed it is a defense mechanism to stop my mind from thinking too much. Just like that, we stopped being close to each other. I am with my stuff, and you with yours.

Sometimes, I wondered if our meeting was meant to be. It felt like I dropped by a happy place and it really was fun. You made me feel different, a feeling I always wanted to have, too good to be true. Yes, it indeed too good to be true. I mean you are so hot and it's like anyone is willing to throw themselves to you. Me is like someone who people don't even looked at. It is sad but it's true. I don't think anyone actually looked at me like you do. You left an important event in my life. But, that's juz who you are, a dream too good to be true. Although it seems wrong, it felt right at times...

And now, all that's left is juz me and your memories. I really missed you, sometimes I stalked your FB and looked like u r doing fine. I guess I am happy I guess. Life is juz so confusing sometimes. You who may looked like you are mine but you are not. It's like How I Met Ur Mother haha. Maybe in da future we will meet again and then maybe then we can... be together. I will make myself ready till the day come.

Okay, I am out of topic lol. But, when you get heartbroken, it is a continuous process. Mine happened like 2 years ago and I am still thinking about it, sometimes... I guess I still wants you. It sounded stupid and it won't happen. Yup but I will keep dreaming... It's the only thing I can do...

Ok, a quote for tonight. Well my mother always said you can't put price on love. Actually, Tiffany's mom said that haha.