I don't have a dream, that's the point. i still remember during orientation week, we were asked, who wants to take medicine, i was like shit, what should i say, errr... People before me and after me, many said MEDICINE. I was like, what's with people and medicine. You can say I am quite a blank and dull at that time and unsure of the current mind of people. Mind of the people all said I WANT MEDICINE, which I found weird. So, basically i came therelike a headless chicken with no aim and direction. i simply follow where fate takes me, but believe me, i have a dream, but it's too risky and doesn't seem achievable so i juz leave that dream on hold. maybe someday i can put that drea to work.
ok, back to peeps who r crazy about medicine. i must say having no purpose and aims in life makes u a complete loser, so i seek mine out as i study and i tried my best at finding my purposes. sometimes it is juz pointless to think about what is my aim in life, well if u ask me now, i have one. i want to be a good doctor and not a half-ass one. so i really hope that i can learn as much knowledge that can be useful to me in my career. that is pretty much what i am aiming for, and survive in this medicine along the way.
sometimes i wondered f this is the right choice but i believe, part of me does, believe that God somehow is guiding me throughout the madness of this world, i am not reli a religious person, i guess my personality and behavior played a part in contributing to that. that is why only part of me believe, i tried my best not to lose faith but then... haha it's okay. so for as long as i know, i tried to be neutral and that pretty much comes out when people asked me stuff, its either its okay or bad. i never said yes confidently. because i don't even have that much faith in me. i am so scared also about the future, i mean i may be neutral now, but if i turn bad soon, too much will be lost, people around me will suffer. that is why my real dream is not achievable because it will hurt a lot of people. remember when i said i am not reli a nice person, i tried not to get too close to anyone, this is kinda like why. because when the moment comes, i juz know i won't be able to hold back and i will start hurting others close to me. so less closer u r to me, the better.
ok back to medicine again. hmmm,,, i mean i know a few friends who would die for medicine. some with their countless family fortunes are willing to go abroad to study medicine. some who cant afford medicne go for any available courses. Dream is juz so powerful. people r willing to spend money for their dream. well, if u r rich then it's okay. but in my view, people have different background and as long as u have a dream. u have a goal in ur life, no matter how small or big ur dream is. well, i used to hear, DREAM BIG. i think my dream fits me juz fine.i am growing better in every aspect in my life.
Also, dream and put it to action, dun juz dream k. u can't get anywhere with words but with hard work. i believe efforts will pay off, efforts that bear fruits especially. maybe i shud talk about efforts next time. tmrw maybe since i have many free time in my hand.
I think i strayed off the DREAM path haha, so many nonsense sprouted along the way but it is okay. i also found a quote for myself. i never had any quote before , welll my quotes usually came from movie like Chucky hahaha : My mother alays said that you cannot put price on love. kinda true. but i found this much more meaningful ~
So I guess that would be all. Enjoy your day and dream.
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